Anal Masturbation 411: How to Get Started
If you’re new to anal masturbation, don’t worry about it – we’re going to walk you through it from beginning to end, offering tons of great tips and techniques throughout.
If you’re completely new to anal play, the perfect place to start is the shower. Start by cleaning your booty, then bending over and allowing the water from the shower to stimulate your anus. Breathe deeply and connect with your anus – this helps you to get more comfortable with the feeling of light pressure in that area.
Next up would be some good old-fashioned regular masturbation. Set yourself up in a calm and Zen environment and pleasure yourself how you typically would. Giving yourself a regular orgasm before tackling the back door is a good way to get relaxed and in the mood. Once you’re feeling prepped, tap into some anal foreplay before attempting any penetration. Start by stoking, massaging and even lightly spanking your butt cheeks, and then slowly move closer to the anal opening, where most of the nerve endings are.
While you’re engaging in some solo foreplay, don’t be afraid to move around and try different positions. If you’re a beginner, it might take some time to adjust and maneuver your arm comfortably to back door territory. Experiment with different positions, add some pillows under your pelvis if needed, or even stand. Find what works for you!
Another important factor that often gets overlooked is practicing conscious breathing and relaxation. Any tensing may cause pain or discomfort instead of pleasure, which is why being in the right environment and headspace is crucial.
Before you attempt any sort of penetration the most important tool you’ll need is lubricant. Since the anus does not self-lubricate, you’re going to have to rely on other methods to keep it as wet as possible always. A body-safe and phthalate-free water-based lube is recommended because of the easy clean-up and nourishing effect, as well as it being compatible with silicone toys and condoms, if you decide to use any. However, keep in mind that water-based lubricants can dry quickly, so be sure to keep reapplying as needed.
Silicone lubricants are great for sensitive skin, but can’t be used with other silicone products, so if this is what you want to use, stick to fingers only! Oil-based lubes are very long-lasting, so they’re a great option for those who don’t want to have to worry about reapplying a ton of lube. But it’s important to note that oil-based lubes are prone to breaking condoms, so keep that in mind if you’re adding that layer of protection to minimize the spread of bacteria.
The easiest way to begin penetration is to start with your own fingers. Apply plenty of lube on your opening and fingers, and rub one finger on the rim of your butthole. As you get more aroused, keep applying more pressure and depth to your penetration. Just make sure your fingernails are cut short to avoid any cuts or injury!
Why Try Solo First
Anal masturbation isn’t just about getting off – it’s about connecting with an erogenous zone that may have been culturally stigmatized as taboo. Some are uncomfortable with the idea of anal because it has been conditioned in them from a young age that it is dirty, immoral, or just plain wicked. If you feel you might need to work through a battle against these beliefs yet still want to experiment with anal, then trying it alone first will be better. Sex shouldn’t feel shameful, and facing it alone can help you calm your nerves and ensure that you enjoy the act, before sharing the experience with someone else.
Another reason for wanting to try solo first is to know how to please yourself first! There’s nothing hotter in the bedroom than someone who knows what they like, and can communicate that to their partner. At the end of the day, no one knows your body like you do. You can test your limits and find out what you like, don’t like, and how far you’re willing to go!
Male Anal Masturbation
As we get into male anal masturbation, the golden spot that may come to mind for many is the P-spot, also called the prostate. You can stimulate the P-spot through the perineum, which is the patch of skin between the balls and the anus, or by penetrating about 2 inches into the anus. If you hit the P-spot, you’re going to feel intense, body-shuddering waves of pleasure.
There’s no rule on needing to only focus on the anus – double your hot masturbation session with a simultaneous hand job! Grasp your penis and stroke it up and down along the shaft, picking up the pace as you approach climax.
Female Anal Masturbation
For women, a killer orgasm can come from stimulating the A-spot, also known as the anterior fornix. Located about 5 or 6 inches into the vagina, you can indirectly penetrate it through anal sex. The A-spot is an area filled with erotically charged nerve endings which can quickly make you extremely wet and aroused. The feeling of A-spot stimulation is pleasurable enough, but an A-spot orgasm is mind-blowing. They’re way more intense and last longer than regular orgasms.
The wonderful part about being a female is that you can have as many orgasms as you want, and you have plenty of erogenous zones to play with. Whether you’re giving or receiving –or both! – you can use your hand, fingers or a toy to rub along the clit and hood for added pleasure.
The woman’s body has plenty of erogenous zones, so as your stimulating your anus with one hand, feel free to use the other hand with or without toys to explore the rest of your body. Pause on sensitive areas like your neck, breasts, scrotum, or even back of the knees and inner arms.
Broaden your horizon by adding in some DP action – penetrate your vagina while having some anal fun. Whether your partner wants to use his penis or you choose to use a toy, it’s sure to double the pleasure. See if you can hit the G-spot while you’re at it!
Anal Masturbation with a Partner
There isn’t a long list of activities more erotic than mutual masturbation with a partner. If you’re a beginner, you should still follow the tips mentioned above on how to get started with anal masturbation. If you’re already comfortable with anal play, just remember to start off relaxed and aroused.
If you’re the receiving partner, indulge in some erotic foreplay beforehand. Take a hot bath, light some scented candles, or watch some porn – anything that will get you relaxed and ready. If you’re more experienced, you can have a butt plug inserted long before your sensual play session for an even bigger build-up of arousal. Lastly, make sure you’ve got plenty of lube on hand!
If you’re the giving partner, help get your partner in the mood by giving them the best foreplay session of their lives. Touch, lick and kiss the areas in and around their anus. After foreplay, if you’ve applied enough lube, you’re good to use your hands or beloved toys and get penetrating!
Despite there being multiple ways to masturbate anally, there are also tons of different positions to try! The best way to find out which position is best for you is by trial and error. Experiment slowly with yourself or with a partner until eventually finding the one which you feel most comfortable with.
To do this one by yourself, start by lying face down on your stomach, and reach your arm behind you, resting it on your back. Reach your finger or toy towards your perineum or anus, and tease and insert at your ease.
To do this with a partner, lie face down with your arms at your sides, and your legs slightly spread apart. Meanwhile, your partner can sit on whichever side is most comfortable for them, while gently massaging your anus.
On your side
To try out this position, lie on your side and bring your outer leg up towards your chest, and reach around to explore and stimulate your anus. You can also do this position with a partner, by having them sit behind you and reaching over to your anus.
Get on all fours, and reach your arm between your legs or around your back to reach your anal opening. Massage and penetrate it at your pace. If you’re doing this with a partner, all they need to do is kneel behind you to reach your anus.
Cow is a fun and different one to try out, but is better suited for more experienced players. To do it alone, start by stabilizing your dildo, vibrator or other toy of choice on the seat of a chair, or any stable surface. Next, straddle your chair or gently kneel, hovering your butt just above the toy. Lower down slowly, gradually inserting the toy until you reach a depth that feels the best for you.
To do this with a partner, lie on your back and have them straddle you, preferably while wearing a strap-on if they aren’t penetrating you with their penis. Have them put their knees on either side of your hips, and your hands on the bed or floor, and lower their butt, using their hips to slide inside you slowly, controlling the depth.
This position can only be used with a partner, but the best part is that it gives both partners the opportunity for anal stimulation at the same time! One partner will lie flat on their back and the other partner will kneel over their partner while facing the opposite direction. To practice anal stimulation in this position, you just have to reach your arms over and spread your partner’s butt cheeks, and then reach their anus.
One of the best parts of anal play is playing with different techniques and discovering your new favorites! Whether you use one of these or a combination, you’re in for a wild ride.
If you’re practicing with a partner, tongue play can be an excellent stimulator of the nerve endings in and around the anus. You most likely won’t be able to stimulate the P-spot or A-spot directly, but it’ll still create an extremely erotic sensation. If you’re the giving partner, use the tip of your tongue to tease along the cheeks before slowly working your way between them. Swirl your tongue around the anal opening first, then push the tip into the opening, darting in and out, mirroring a thrust.
Finger stimulation can work whether you’re with a partner or alone. The fun with using your fingers for anal stimulation is the variety in movements and motions. Here are some of our favorites.
Come hither: This is a classic move for a reason. When you slowly insert your lubed finger into the anus and curl your finger upward, you’re almost guaranteeing your partner a whirlwind of pleasure. As you go, gradually increase the depth and speed, and add some fingers if your partner is feeling comfortable and stretched. Once you’ve found the right pace and motion, just keep going as the pressure builds.
Circling: When you feel that you’ve reached either the A-spot or P-spot, rub your finger in a circular motion, picking up the pace as your partner requests it. Play around with pressure and speed to find the perfect combination.
Doorbell: From either the inside or the outside, find the tender sweet spot that makes them moan with pleasure and press your finger against it, as if ringing a doorbell. Start this act by applying light pressure, then gradually increase pressure and speed.
Stimulated vibration: When you or your partner are close, you can stimulate vibrations by moving your speed up.
Finally, you can use a sex toy, or if you’re playing with a partner, then a penis or strap-on. No matter which you choose, you can play around with pressure – applying or removing pressure will help you find your sweet spot. You can also play around with depth. Everyone’s pleasure points are different, so take it slow and gentle. Vibrations are also great when you’re close and want to push yourself over the edge! There are plenty of vibrating massagers with different vibration and pulse settings, so try out different combinations and see what does the trick.
Of course, we’ve saved the best for last. Double penetration is absolutely on the table! While you can surely do this with a partner and a toy at the same time, there are also toys that have dual function, allowing you double penetration. Whether you have an external vibe that stimulates the perineum or clitoris during penetration, or a dual penetrating dildo or vibrator to penetrate the anus and vagina –if you have one– at the same time, you’re in for the climax of a lifetime!
There are a few precautions that you should be taking with regards to cleanliness. Firstly, whether you’re the giving partner or engaging in solo masturbation, you should make sure to have your fingernails properly groomed – trim and file your nails to prevent tearing the delicate skin of the anus, and to prevent the bacteria under your nails from entering your partner’s anus. You should always make sure to wash your hands thoroughly before any activity. If you want to take it a step further, you can put on a pair of latex or nitrile gloves to prevent any fluid transmission.
During play, be very careful not to move your hands or toys from the anus to the vagina, or anywhere around it – this could cause some serious infections. The clean-up afterwards is equally important. Even if you don’t see it, fecal matter and bacteria from the anus can spread after touching the inside or outside of your anus. If you used gloves, throw them away immediately, and wash your hands and genital areas thoroughly.
Additionally, use a wet cloth on any parts of your body that you touched before and after your anal play to cleanse the area.
Remember to also wash off the toys and disinfect them properly, as well as the lube bottle that you used. You want to avoid ruining your memorable play session by minimizing the potential spread of any bacteria. Make sure to store them in a cool, dry area afterwards to prevent mold or bacteria growth.